Friday comedy post: why chuck Norris?

Hey it's Friday girls and Justin bieber is not performing! It's Friday comedy with your friday comedian-Ryan
So there is this fad, called the Chuck Norris fad. And all this fad is basically threatening people with the words chuck Norris. It's freakin' weird an I'm scared. One kid says to me, "hey why did the chicken cross the road?" I say " because he wanted to get to the other side." you expect that to be it right? Wrong , exactly more twisted than ever. The kid says "because chuck Norris was holding a gun to the chickens head." i just stand there appalled that a ten year old kid is telling me chuck norris is holding a gun at a chicken. While at the mean time, how many 10 year olds think of threatening someone with a gun. I'm abit scared. Also chuck Norris is famous for his role as Ronald McDonald. This man I'm sure has been mentally messed up by being this character. What really drives me crazy is how people talk about chuck Norris and the soviet union. I mean what the hell! The soviet union? That's just ridiculous. But the good things is that this chuck Norris phase is gone for now. This is your Friday comedian signing off until next time.

Why the dentist is scary.

What does the dentist live off of?
The fear the children have going into the office, sitting in the chair that goes back a lot then strapping you down to see... The most horrifying thing ever DENTAL FLOSS. This has been a joke from your friday comedian-Ryan

5th Budda baby joke

What kind of tree is Budda baby's favorite tree?
A bonsai tree!
This has been a Budda baby joke from your friday comedian-Ryan

President Joke

You know how Richard Nixon always said "I will never tell a lie" and how he did the peace sign with his fingers? When you weren't looking he'd cross his fingers
This has been a joke from your friday comedian-Ryan

4th Budda baby joke

What kind of drum set does Budda baby play?
A peaceful one!
This has been a Budda baby joke from your Friday comedian-Ryan

3rd Budda Baby Joke

"Hey bill what Harry Potter house is Budda baby in?"
"Let me guess, Griffendoor?"
"No! HufflePuff because thats where all the fat people go!"
This has been A Budda baby joke from your Friday Comedian-Ryan

2nd Budda baby joke

"Hey what's your favorite type of I've cream?"
"rocky road"
"you know who else likes rocky road?"
"Budda baby"
This has been your daily Budda baby baby joke from your friday comedian-Ryan

1st Budda baby joke

"hey bob why's your favorite type of ice cream?"
"vanilla."
"do you like hot fudge on your vanilla ice cream?"
"well I suppose"
"you know who doesn't like hot fudge on their vanilla ice cream?"
"who?"
"Budda baby! since it makes the vanilla ice cream unpure!"
"real funny Phillip"
This is today's Budda baby joke from your Friday comedian- Ryan

Budda baby, new daily jokes

Hey it's your Friday comedian- Ryan and I'm starting a new segment called Budda baby! Jokes basically ending with Budda baby, you'll see!

Fri-2nd december- Friday comedy-stage presence and how to make those kids laugh

Hey it's Friday and you know what that means- the Friday comedy blog by yours truly-Ryan. Now to be funny on stage there are a number Of things your can do, stupid stunts, jokes, and even engaging the audience in activities. Public speaking. Of all time said to be one of the hardest things to do, not for me. You know why? Because I believe I have gotten very great at it. How do I get to be great at it? This is what I do. Before I go on, I think ahead, thinking ahead is one of the most critical steps to public speaking. If you don't know what your saying you're screwed the minute you step on stage. You may reference a cheat sheet, but it's more engaging for the audience to see and think "wow he is really comfortable up there". If you show a calm presence of stage they will listen to you but possibly not engage if you're boring. That's why I like to say, if the audience didn't even chuckle, I did something not great. But id the audience does laugh or chuckle i l know they listened Because they laughed. Another thing to public speaking is including the audience in what you're doing, connect with the audience so they're thinking a d paying attention to you and not the person next to them. Now public speaking is harder to do with different aged people, particulary kids are easiest.", then teens to adults. Maybe teens are actually harder because I you throw In a few swears and really get into something they will laugh. Any ways back to comedy. I do a lot of my comedy on stage, public speaking usually as a host when I can get to be the host, and damn! I am a great host or mc. I always have gotten a laugh or two. Never have I not gotten one, and from all the catagories of audiences I mentioned earlier. So basically here if you master public speaking, you can be a better comedian than me! Because I was a pretty lousy president - Bill Clinton from The Simpsons. Well that's it for this comedy blog with your Friday comedian- Ryan, comment you later!

Fri-25th of november- comedy: video and movie jokes

Happy day after thanksgiving, anyways-Hey it's Friday and its that time for comedy from your friday comedian Ryan. So this Friday I Am doing video and movie mix-ups. My first joke is this:
"hey bob!"
"what?"
"don't you just love spok from battles tar galactica?"
"wait isn't spok from star trek?"
The guy who was telling the joke got nervous and ran away.
That is my first joke obviously a movie/tv series mix-up. Where mixing up the magnificant spok from star trek to battlestar galactica. Next I have another joke that is video game related:
"hey Joey why is Mastercheif so bad in super smash brothers brawl?"
"randy do you even know what you're talking about?"
"not really joey, all I know is that"
"shut up randy"
"ok"
There is another joke I've
Made with a weird mix-up. Mastercheif from Halo 4 and previous games in nintendos Super-smash Brothers brawl? That would be weird. Last thing I want to see is Mastercheif with a pretty bad burn from Mario and seeing Mario with some pretty bad plasma burns. Here's another one, red spartan vs. solid snake. Who has better grenades? Idk but snake is in for some blue stickys on his crotch from a cloaked red spartan. Now it's your turn for these mix-ups: your challenge is to make a better tv/movie mixup or a video game mixup by commenting below. Thanks for reading- from your Friday comedian- Ryan

Friday comedy retry-posts

Hi I just posted before this on what I'll be doing and I just want to correct that I'll be making a post on video and movie mix-up jokes. Be ready! From your Friday comedian-Ryan